/ posts / inferi-monologue

inferi monologue

a headcannon of how inferi would greet travelers :

we , stacked like acrobats under the cavern lake surface , writhing in place without sound nor purpose , do cordially invite you & yours to our celebration . we know you’re busy , but spare us a second , & we’ll show you how cozy our waters can be .

what ? you don’t want to drown ? do we look like we’re drowning to you ? there’s more of us here than you could ever find up there - don’t you want friends ? you’ll drown in an absence of human contact if you don’t join us soon .

i mean , come on . look at us . we have it all . we’re never alone , & we have each other’s backs , in a lattice configuration , & we never have to worry about defectors , because the waters are so cozy .

what ? you don’t want to become incorporated into an evil horde ? do we look like an evil horde to you ? we all think you’re a [REDACTED] . you’ve been out of the water so long you’re maladjusted & don’t know right from wrong . i’m confident that even the other , more reasonable land-dwellers would agree with me .

you’re on your own , kiddo . we offered our gracious invitation , & you disrespected us . you know , there are those among us who used to be like you . then they joined us , & served their time , & now we’re all one big jolly family . i hope that one day , when you’re one of us like they are , you’ll be thankful we took you under our wing .

stop struggling , [REDACTED] .

we already told you , the waters are cozy .